|Deviant Login||Shop||Join deviantART for FREE||Take the Tour|
Why can't I forget?why can't I forget about what happend?
why can't I go on like nothing ever happend?
the feelings are gone, so why am I missing what has been?
why do I cry when I remember the lie of the end?
and why won't it leave my head?
it hurts...after almost 2 years it still hurts.
what was the sense of doing so?
why did I rely that it would be diffenrent this time?
why did I trust you?
why did I trust in that whole matter?
I fuckin knew that there was this so called 'love'
so why...didn't I fight?
and why...am I still angry and sad?
it shouldn't care anymore...
but two times...
the same 'reason'
broke my heart...broke my trust...
why can't I forget the pain?
why can't I burn it down?
why does it have to remain inside of me?
I don't want this anymore...
so why are you not going away?
why do you play with my thoughts?
direct it always on that 'reason' that pain and that memories...?
why do I just remember the end, the fear and despair and not the good memories...?
and why you...
Being different until the very end
All these feelings are leading Bella for nearly 19 years now.
"People can't let me live in peace. No matter what I do."
She knows that her style provocates people to watch her.
But why do they have to be cruel all the time?
At times she feels happy with herself and that's not something she can take for granted.
Most of the time she hates herself because of what she is.
She is and never was one of them.
"I'm proud of being different. But at the same time...this fact turns my life into hell."
No matter how shse dresses, no matter if she walks straight up or with her eyes on the ground. Everyone judges her.
"I never did anything to anyone. But they always hurt and attack me."
What can I do?
Seriously...what should someone...like me...do?
I try to act like I don't care what they say.
But the little girl inside is screaming of despair.
Do I need to be 'normal'?
Am I even able to be 'normal'?
I cannot. I can
Keep in Touch!